Heaven On Earth With An Onion Slice

[robblerobble]

It starts with strange, mop-like creatures that smell of french fries setting up a boombox outside the local burger place. With a click, the boombox starts playing a song on repeat.

And then, with a burst of smoke that smells like cooked beef, appears the famous no-goodnik, THE HAMBURGLAR. Strutting inside the restaurant, he makes a dramatic flourish with his cape, declaiming grandly.

"Cheeseburger, robble robble!"

Behind him, his two Fry Guy minions skate inside, doing their best to look threatening. This is a stickup, diners! ALL YOUR BURGERS ARE BELONG TO HIM.

Comments

[robblerobble]

Seeing as how Hamburglar has his hands full - he could just use Burger Strength, but he's uninterested in hurting people, just stealing their burgers - the Fry Guys are on their own against their fellow minions.

As they quiver with antici...pation, a fine white powder floats off their bodies. This is, of course, the one ranged attack the Fry Guys possess - the Salty Shimmy Shake!

The iodized table salt clings to anything with the slightest bit of moisture - like, perhaps, a certain ketchup-smeared astronaut?

[number1_kerbal]

Jeb tried to wrestle a bit longer with Hamburglar-but then the blast of a laser pistol caught his attention and he turned-

Yep, Bill had lost his nerve again-and blasted all the burgers into oblivion, splattering the fry guys with burning fragments of bag and exploded burger.

[robblerobble]

"ROBBLE ROBBLE!"

AVENGE THE BURGERS!

Hamburglar lets just enough Burger Strength into his grip to toss Jebediah away as he draws out his final weapon - the Mayo Grenade. Bill is quickly plastered to the nearest wall by a thick, gooey coating of mayonnaise as the Hamburglar and his Fry Guys escape, taking the boombox and shaking their fists at the trio of astronauts.

[number1_kerbal]

"...Bill? Bob?"

"Yeah boss?"

"What the heck just happened?"